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Stupid Job Ads: Name Withheld

Wednesday, April 18, 2007 10:42 pm

Recently posted on Denver Craigslist:

A full service Marketing Solutions company is looking for a web / interactive programmer to help us build our interactive group. You must be familiar with all major web design programs, browsers, authoring software, and operating systems. You know html, xml, flash, actionscript, java, asp, php, .net, and even cold fusion. You are able to conquer any database integration assignment with glee. You are an innovative thinker with the soul of a hacker. You should love experimenting with new technology, software and applications. You must work well in a highly collaborative environment. You are detail manic and capable of incorporating motion graphics, video and sound easily into ground breaking interactive & web projects. You are a problem solver and stay up late thinking of cool ways to inject excitement into the digital experience. We want you to help us create sophisticated and highly functional flash-based web experiences and interface with client back-ends of all types.

You are a self-motivated, computer wunderkind… who in addition to being an application programmer also likes the IT world. You have an acute (yes I said acute) understanding of DNS, Domain management, servers, software, multiple operating systems and firewall management. Phew! Oh and did we mention that you have to do it all with a positive attitude – well we just did.

Think you have what it takes? Send us your unbelievably awesome resume and portfolio. Make us want you. Then we’ll talk…

Location: Lakewood
Compensation: 35-40K DOE

Almost wanted to add, “Dude, send us your unbelievably awesome resume…” Obviously, they’re aiming high by seeking a web developer, flash designer AND server admin, all for 35K.


  1. Hi!

    I want to improve my SQL knowledge.
    I red that many SQL resources and want to
    get more about SQL for my occupation as oracle database manager.

    What would you recommend?


  2. Hi Werutz,

    I’d recommend joining the Oracle Technology Network. You can download personal copies of their database, server and developer software to set up in a development environment:


    They offer great tutorials and forums where you can connect with other Oracle DBAs. Once you’re familiar with the product and Oracle career tracks, start working through their certification program:


    Good luck!

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